Zion & Bryce: Helluva Place to Lose a Cow

After Las Vegas debauchery, we started our tour of the Southwest’s red wiggly rocks. The first stop was Zion National Park, which was originally called Mukuntuweap National Park, meaning “straight canyon” in Southern Paiute. In 1918, the national Park service changed the name to Zion - a term used by the Mormons who had settled in the surrounding area in the 1860s. Zion is a red and tan-colored canyon eroded by the Virgin River over time.

We hiked the Angel’s Landing Trail. There are warnings on all park information about long drop-offs, not for young children, not for anyone fearful of heights etc. The trailhead notes that 9 people have died falling off the top section, a narrow ridge to the summit. Nevertheless, America being liability country, neither Corey nor I expected how precarious the top section would be! Possibly the most dangerous thing I’ve done in the States. Though, mostly because of other humans and their propensity to behave unpredictably. It was beautiful and absolutely worth it however.

After the hike, we stopped by the Human History Museum. I was quite disappointed that despite 8,000 years of Native American habitation in this area before the European settlers came, there was very little on any of this human history in the museum, but more on how the early settlers lived. Our moods improved later in the day, when we realized that there was a brew pub 10 minutes walking distance from our campsite, with a sign that said “come in to drink the beer that one yelp reviewer described as the worst beer of his life.”

After Zion, we drove to Bryce Canyon National Park (which is not a canyon, but a collection of hoodoos on the edge of a plateau apparently). On the drive, there were an unusual number of establishments (including Subway) announcing that they had espresso machines. Given the number of European hikers we have seen in the national parks, we think this is mostly to ensnare them. Hoodoos are sand castle-looking geological structures eroded by frost, water and wind. The park was named after Ebenezer Bryce, a Scottish immigrant who was sent by the Mormon Church to settle in this area in 1874. Bryce grazed cattle in what is now the national park and “reputedly thought that the amphitheaters were a ‘helluva place to lose a cow’." There was unreliable water supply however. When efforts to construct a water diversion channel failed, all the settlers moved elsewhere. Bryce himself moved his family to Arizona in 1880. He lived there for 6 years and the national park is named after him. Remember the earlier paragraph on people who lived in these areas for thousands of years?

We walked around the parked, marveled at the hoodoos and did agree with Bryce that this would be helluva a place to raise cows.